lost in the unknown

Maybe you've recently been let go. Or your job has been put on "pause." Maybe you feel lost in the unknown.

If you're there right now, I know how it feels. I know how devastating it is. I know how it crushes your confidence. Makes you feel like you may never fly again.

Losing a job is debilitating. The questions of "why didn't they like me?" "what did I do wrong?" "how am I not good enough?" plague us.

In this vulnerable state, it's easy to want to give up. It's easy to wallow and stay in the "poor me" place.

And it's so important to validate our feelings.

But staying there for too long isn't helpful. Because if we beat ourselves up for too long, we can start believing the voice that says we're not good enough.

But I know, you are good enough. I know you are so valuable. I know we need you.

But in order to go from dejected to determined to rise again, we need to look at what stories you're telling yourself.

Are you blaming yourself for being laid off? Are you buying into the story that you didn't bring enough value to the team?

If you're continually telling yourself how much you suck, how does that make you feel?

Sucky, right?

But what if you told yourself a different story? What if you could choose to see that they had to let you go in order to save the company? Or maybe they're having to get creative in managing this new environment and had to allocate funds somewhere else?

What story could you tell that would make yourself feel better?

Of course, we want to learn from our past experiences - so don't forget to do that.

But if we're in a place where we can't stop the self-flagellation, changing the story we tell ourselves can help.

Because the truth is, we'll never know the "real" reason you were let go. We'll never know why it was you and not someone else. We'll never know if there was something you could have done differently to keep your job.

So instead of beating ourselves up in the "what ifs," let's create a story that makes you feel good.